You’ve got it all wrong…. and I don’t care if it pisses you off!
I saw a post, you know one of those funny ecards that we all love so much. The ones that say what we are thinking, but are to afraid to just say it. This one at first I thought I liked, but then I realized its wrong, and maybe that’s what holding Step-parents back from really loving their kiddos.
The saying ” When you selflessly love more than you ought…you’re a Good Stepmom”. It shouldn’t be your a good stepmom, it should be your a good person. There is no correct amount of love for a child, except Unconditional, always, no matter whose birthing canal they got pushed out of! It actually makes me a little heated thinking of it. Is this why there is such a stigma behind Step-moms, because we think we go above and beyond? That we deserve more and better because we love a child that isn’t biologically ours? That is flat out RIDICULOUS!
We are amazing, and stand above the rest, because we endure if anything the ex-spouses, both stepmoms and stepdads. I never look at my SS and think “wow sometimes its hard to love you”, or “you should be thankful I pushed my love tank a little too passed empty for you today”??? Because, if that’s the category I am in, I am OUT!
I look at my SS and I want to kiss him, to snuggle him, to play with him. I want MORE time with him, MORE memories, MORE everything. I hate when he goes home, I miss him terribly, he is my heart, and not because I married a man with “baggage” but because I got the “Package Deal” !! My kiddos and I got a wonderful man, a great stepfather for them, and a funny, sweet, loving little brother and son.
Maybe the kids are the ones that are awesome, great and fantastic, for loving more than one Mom, or more than one dad, or loving siblings that they just are forced to get to know.
More of my thankfulness comes from the fact that this little man, chose to love ME, chose to give me a chance, to trust me, to feel safe with me, because I never saw him as a choice, not once. Nor, will I ever!
Posted on July 31, 2012, in Love, Parenting, Stepparents and tagged angry, dad, kiddos, kids, Love, misconceived, misunderstood, mom, son, stigma, unconditional, wrong. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.