In the shower this morning, I found myself thinking about the same three women I am always intrigued by. These three women being none other than, Marilyn Monroe, Mae West and Elizabeth Taylor. Three women, that weren’t afraid to be real, act real, and talk real. They were loved my many, chastised by some, judged for choices, labeled by mistakes and still all lived a life of great poise, intelligence and love.
The scandals around these women, their marriages, the famous birthday song to the president and high sex appeal made them extremely intriguing to me. Any woman, who does as she wants, who follows her heart, who isn’t afraid to say what she feels and not always cross her T’s or dots her I’s, or this case, maybe not always crossed their legs, is my type of woman. They stood up for who and what they believed in, regardless of Hollywood’s approval, or society’s stuffy standards. They all literally broke the mold, and led the way for someone like me.
Browsing, the Biography isle at Barnes and Noble you just can’t miss any book with the classically beautiful picture of Marilyn, or Elizabeth. I had just finished Jesse James’ new tell all book, and I was thirsting for something new and inviting. His book was pleasantly surprising, along with my favorite ladies, I tip my hat to anyone, Man or Woman that can say in a nut shell – I failed, I need help, I hurt someone, I am not perfect- and be okay with it internally and publicly. Because I have done that all, and it takes a strong person to admit it. Looking, through the picture book of Marilyn and reading the quotes here and there, I realized how much I really needed to write my book. I have always wanted to tell my story, to be unafraid, and finally get it all out.
I have always been incapable of bullshit, and when I say that I don’t mean my own, just others. My friends describe me as blunt, with mild use of a filter. Truth is, I think and believe the way I want, it is swayable by others, I may be enlightened or made privy to something I previously wasn’t aware of, but my main core of thinking is unshakable.
What makes my life an interest to others, well first off I’m 32 years old, I’ve been married more times than many, okay not Elizabeth Taylor or Zsa Zsa, but by the time they were my age, I have beat them. I have lost a child, not by death, but by deceit. I’ve broken laws, I been cheated on, been an investigator, been abused, almost killed, I’ve been in love and then realized it wasn’t love at all, I lived without a mother and refused to let it affect my life, I’ve lost a father who lost himself long before that.